Have you
ever wanted something so bad that it hurts at times while waiting to obtain it?
Have you ever stopped to ask God if He really thinks you are strong enough to
handle all of the “character building”
and “stretching” you feel is going on in your life at a certain time,
just to quickly hear Him say “you can take it" because He is holding it ALL
right there with you?
It can be a very
challenging, sometimes hard, dark season of life, when you are in the thick of
things but you know what….. He is Faithful!
2 Peter1:3(NIV)
His divine power has given us
everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him who
called us by His own glory and goodness.
Today
marks a year and a day since we started our adoption process for our baby girl;
Zoey.
When we
took that picture last August of 2013, after church we were in a very different
place than we are this August of 2014.
We had a
“plan” as to how we would finance a $40,000 dollar adoption and we had an
“idea” as to a time frame that we could be working within, in which we would be
holding our baby girl.
Needless
to say, things are not going the way we “imagined” they would go, but you
know what else…. He is still Faithful!
Isaiah 43:1 (MSG)
But now God’s Message, the God
who made you in the 1st
place, Jacob, the One who got you started Israel: “Don’t be afraid, I’ve
redeemed you. I’ve called your Name. You’re mine. When you’re in over your
head, Ill be there with you. When you’re between a rock and a hard place, it
wont be a dead end- Because I am God, your personal God. The Holy of Israel,
the Savior.
We have
had many friends and family ask us where we are at in our adoption process and
to tell you the truth, I have been hesitant to update the blog because it has
been a hard season, but even as we are in the season still, I see His hand and
rest in His faithfulness that He is writing this story and not us. And in the
end, no mater how it ends, it is His story and we want Him to have all the
Glory.
Last
August we started our international adoption process with AWAA (hyperlink)
& Ethiopia in hopes of it being a 18month to 2 year process in which the ending would be us
holding a precious baby girl. We moved
quite quickly through the paper chase and were able to get finger prints and
our home study completed in about 6 – 8 weeks instead of the usual 3-6months. Our
agency and social worker are amazing!
It was
goosebumpy good to see how fast things were falling into place.
Also, for
the first part of the adoption an initial $5,000 was needed to start and Ben
and I were able to finance that quite
quickly. All in all, August and
September were easy months and exciting months as we officially got started.
October
came and the “easy” disappeared J
We found
out mid October that I was no longer going to hold the position of Family Nurse
Practitioner at the primary care clinic that I had grown to love.
Due to
budget cuts and other events, my position was being eliminated. We were
disappointed, to say the least. When we received the news, we quickly started
praying and giving it to God, not knowing what His plan was but knowing He
holds it all. My position allowed Ben and I to “finance” the adoption with
little to no stress to our budget. We saw it as God’s provision.
I worked
two days a week and was able to be home with the boys the rest of the time. It
was easy. I loved the ladies and gentleman that I got to work with. The doctors
are some of the best men that I have ever met and they love their patients and
the ladies at the office that kept the place moving and a grooving were like
none other. They were not only co-workers, but also friends. When I had to be away from my
babies, I was doing something that I loved, serving and loving on others.
My heart
was sad and both Ben and I were unclear as to whether AWAA and our social worker
would allow us to continue our adoption of Zoey, due to all of the major life
changes. We gave it to God and made a few calls and were informed that we could
proceed with the adoption.
Once
again, God was holding it All.
1 Colossians 1:17
He is before all things, and in
Him all things hold together.
Two days
after the news of my job termination, we held our first fund raiser. We had
about 10 families donate their “unused treasures” from their homes for us to
sell. We had everything from coffee makers to changing tables, to wedding
flowers and office chairs. It was amazing! We sold baked goods and headbands and
had friends who gave of their time and energy to help us out.
The Lord
blew us away…. Not sure about you, but in the past, garage sales have not been
the most profitable of fund raising events, this one begged to differ: We were
blessed with $3500 from our two day sale
and were able to get a large portion of the 1st half: $20,000 paid
off. God is good!
Numerous
other gifts from friends and family came in as well as Ben started doing more
work with The Center for Christian Counseling and Care, and I got to dibble dabble with my love of
photography and watch as it grew too. It was a very bitter sweet fall and
winter.
November
and December came and it was time to finally send off our dossier (the book of
the paperwork that we had gathered from different government and state
organizations that stated that we were approved to have a sweet baby girl in
our home and told EVERYTHING about us as a family)
All together the papers totaled to be over 50
+ pages. As we went to the post office to deliver our prized possession, you
would have thought we were mailing a large sum of cash or prized jewels (I
guess in a sense we were) ;)
Right
after the New year, we found out that our Dossier had made it to Virginia,
which was the first stop before going to Ethiopia. We were elated to find this
out! However, our elation was soon overshadowed.
We were
driving home from a holiday celebration in the panhandle when I began to get tricklining
in emails that something was not right in Ethiopia and that more character
building was on the way……
Now this
is a segway for a whole other post, but adoption is hard and complicated and
there are many people and lives that are intertwined within just one adoption
process. Thus, we are aware that at times some very unethical events and
circumstances can overshadow an adoption.
Because of
this knowledge, we were very careful in our selection process of our agency.
AWAA has quite a clean record thus far of being ethical and supporting
adoptions both within the countries they are working and outside. Needless to
say, some of the few unethical adoptions that have occurred were starting to
overshadow the many good and the PR from those few had hit main stream media in
Ethiopia and the repercussions were hard and fast.
Shortly
into January Ethiopia stopped writing referalls for children to be adopted out
of the country. They said that they were reevaluating their system and would decide
what needed to be done.
For us, we
were again…. Stopped in our tracks….. Our paperwork had been all approved on
the USA side and was just waiting to be sent to Africa….. We were saddened and heartbroken for the
orphan children who were longing for forever families but may not find them
because of this new ruling.
And of
course we were saddened for our own little family as we were unclear on how to proceed. I remember countless nights of tears
and prayers as we gave it God and knew that if our hearts were aching for these
little ones, how much more was His for all of the little ones?
John 14:18
I will not leave you as
orphans; I will come to you.
Soon into
the month of February after our paperwork had sat in Virginia for close to 6
weeks, we got the news that Ethiopia was beginning to set up a new
infrastructure in which they would still allow international adoptions but
would be taking more time to oversee the system much closer. When I say more
time, I mean 3-4 years per adoption instead of the 18 months to 2 years……
We talked
to many friends and family and prayed about it and sought the Lord and felt his
peace that we should proceed.
Valentines
Day 2014 was the day! Our official Dossier to Ethiopia (DTE). Our paper
pregnancy had officially begun for our child! So many emotions filled that day…… but
we were and are hopeful.
Since
Febuarary, we continue to work hand in hand with our agency as the day seems so
far in the future as to when we will hold our baby girl. We are only two months
away from having the 1st $20,000 paid for and then we will start the
2nd $20,000.
Even in
that large sum of money, we see the Lord, He has been oh so faithful. Each
month He has provided exactly what we need through gifts, and Ben’s job and
photo sessions and headband sales and other garage sales…. The Lord is good and
we feel His hand on our lives.
Ben and I
both joke that we “thought” the Lord was holding the pen and writing this
adoption story of our Zoey, but we see even more each day that not only is He
holding the pen, but He also has the paper, the printer, the beginning and the
ending and we are so glad that HE does.
Our hearts
have been on a roller coaster for sure but He has taught us so much and even
though we don’t understand it all, we Trust Him.
James 1:17
Every good and perfect gift is
from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does NOT
CHANGE like shifting shadows.
We
continue to wait and trust and hope and even though…. Multiple things have
changed since last August: jobs, addresses, time frames, finances, plans,
We know
who holds All of this and though the last year our faith has grown, and our hope
has grown. There is a peace that Ben and I cannot shake. It comes from within, from a God who Loves us, who has called
us and who promises to never let us go. He is our hope that anchors our soul.
Our plan
is to be better at updating our blog and I am going to start posting more of my
photo sessions here, as well as links to different fund raisers and other blogs
about adoption too. We cannot express to each of you reading this how grateful
we are to do Life with you. God is such an amazing Creator to allow us to Love
one another. Thank you for your continual prayers and encouragement.
This story
of our Zoey has many more chapters to come.
God is good ALL the time.
